From the Top
I’ve ventured into a weird world in my 40’s. Two years ago (well 2 years in a couple of weeks) I quit drinking alcohol, and during my second year alcohol free, wrote a book about this journey with some random hopes that my story will resonate with others. During this process I was encouraged to build a website and begin blogging. Well, this is my first post, and as first posts go I’m struggling with what to write. So… I only think it’s appropriate to give a little background of the early journey of life.
I grew up in a wonderful home. When I was born in 1978, I had 2 “bonus” sisters almost 10 years my senior. My younger sister was born just 16 months after me and we lived in Brazoria County. Sweeny to be exact.
What made our home so wonderful (at least in my young eyes) was that our entire family lived in Sweeny or very close. My grandmother and grandfather lived a mile down the road. My aunt and uncle and my best friend and cousin John lived just 2 blocks from them. All of us would vacation together, watch Aggie Football together, and we went to church together at First Baptist Church in Sweeny. Now keep in mind this is the recollection of a 45 year old trying to remember EARLY childhood memories, so bear with me but I’m getting somewhere.
One of the greatest young memories I have was when John, Chad and I started Kindergarten together in Ms Hall’s class. As you can probably imagine, our favorite time of day was recess. Every day during recess we would wait for what we proudly called “The Orange Car” to come to the stop sign and wait for all of us to line up on the fence line. The Orange Car was actually a replica of the Dukes of Hazard “General Lee”. We’d all stand on the fence and wait for that car to burn his tires showing off for a bunch of 6 year olds just to make our day. Kindergarten was great.
The summer before 1st Grade, our wonderful families life would change forever.
I’ve had a hard time over the years putting what I’m about to write into words.
The pain my uncle and aunt had to have felt, now being a father myself had to have been unbearable. Statistically I’ve heard their marriage should not have survived. I thank God it did.
Imagine waking up one day as a young boy, knowing that you had your whole future with your best friend, your cousin, your pal, your Aggie Roommate, your partner in crime - taken away from you.
That was me, the weekend before I had to start 1st grade. I don’t know how to describe this being one of my first core memories other than devastating trauma.
John Edward Marsh II died tragically on August 31, 1985. His headstone in Sweeny cemetery that I still visit frequently says - “He gave so much to be so little, but angels always do”.
Our family was destroyed.
How could this happen? How could this happen to our wonderful family? Why would God do this to my aunt and uncle?
I don’t know that I was asking all of these questions as a 6 year old, but MANY forms of these questions have been on repeat in my brain over the years.
So I started my school journey. Heartbroken and lonely.
I’ll end with this… for this first extremely heavy post.
In the years that followed my best friends death, I never once saw my uncle take a sip of alcohol. I can’t imagine the demons he had to battle, but that was not one of them. I didn’t know what that example would mean to me until I had finally had enough drinking of my own.
I’ll see you again one day my brother.
